SATIRE: Seeking to become more competitive in the private school market, the school will implement a more progressive learning model.
Starting in the 2017-2018 school year, Malvern will implement a more progressive “22nd Century Learning” teaching model, according to Head of School Mr. Christian Talbot.
“21st Century Learning is very student centered,” Talbot said. “In the 22nd Century Learning Model, it’s even more student centered.”
According to Talbot, classes at Malvern will be so student centered next year, the teachers will actually sit in the desks while the students teach the class. Students will be expected to generate lesson plans, grade tests, and enter grades into a new learning management system called Backpack.
“Currently, we’re ahead of the curve. But soon we’ll be extremely far ahead. Precisely a full century ahead of the curve.” -Mr. Christian Talbot
“Currently, we’re ahead of the curve. But soon we’ll be extremely far ahead. Precisely a full century ahead of the curve.”
-Mr. Christian Talbot
“I’m so excited to be taught by students,” AP Economics teacher Mr. John Ostick said. “Students will really understand the topic by having to teach it. I wish I could do this at my classes at St. Joe’s [University].”
Talbot plans to launch this change along with a series of new buzzwords, venn diagrams, and schedules. He said this change comes in an effort to get ahead of colleges and rival high schools so that Malvern is ready when the rest of the educational world catches up.
“Currently, we’re ahead of the curve,” he said. “But soon we’ll be extremely far ahead. About a full century ahead of the curve.”
Next year’s Assistant Head of School for Academics Mr. Patrick Sillup is excited about the change and hinted at more future changes.
“22nd Century Learning will perform perfectly in our six new Mod Spaces next year,” he said. “It going to be a thing of beauty.”
However, not all teachers are sold on this change.
“I’m gonna be honest with you,” Honors British Literature teacher Mr. Richard Roper said, “I’m still gonna teach my class the same I always have.”
Head of the Upper School Mr. Ron Algeo wants teachers and students to focus on the “why” of the change.
“There are many questions that come up with education innovation,” he said. “Will this new change help students? Will they be responsive to it? Are we focusing on the ‘why’ of the issue? These are all great questions that I don’t the answer to, but we’ll have to find out. I think we will, truly, I do.”
Some students are worried about the change. Senior Jerry Curran is concerned about how students will create lesson plans.
“How are we supposed to teach the class without knowing any of the material?” Curran said. “Whatever, I’m outta here anyway.”
Talbot responded to this concern.
“We want our students to be able to solve problems that they’ve never seen before, because 90 percent of the jobs our students will have do not even exist yet,” he said. “So they’ll have to seek out great resources on their own.”
“I recommend sources like Crash Course, Khan Academy, and Yahoo Answers,” Talbot added.
Some students are optimistic about the change. Senior Jack Rooney hopes the new model will be a lot like his Social Entrepreneurship class.
“As long as we get to choose our grades, I like it,” he said. “Otherwise, it’s just dumb.”
This story is satire and not intended as news. Happy April Fools’ Day!